Friday, January 26, 2007

Don't Lump Me In With Your Poor Factory Skills

1) I admit to making tattered jean shorts with a box cutter. But, man, it was hot as dick that summer and I still lived in the attic with kinda shitty air conditioning. The shorts were definitely awful. But it's not like this dress code was ever told to me. I simply made shorts because I was hot. Not as a sign of rebellion. To rebel, I wore one of those Devo-ish jump suits the day I had to clean garbage bins with some maniac.

2) While I freely admit to thinking that job sucked, I've actually had much worse. And I had decent factory skills. I was beloved on the Unisom Sleeping Pills line. My duties were pretty crazy: cleaning out glue hoppers, making sure the bills were in blisters properly, quality assurance, a little bit of maintenance here and there and also pouring 50-pound boxes of sleeping pills into a hopper while standing on a rickety step ladder. And also I was an "intern" so I had to perform "technical writing" and write down the operations for their updating. You were just some hopeless Line 1 trash.

3) Tell your story of how you worked as a hotel bus boy for one day. I've never even worked a job for just one day.